Sunday, December 09, 2007

Dream to dare

(for ppl in the real world [as contrasted with the blogosphere] who know me this post will leave them in splits)
In my dreams…

I am a wild girl constantly ‘living on the edge’ or a biker babe. Myself dressed in the trademark riding jacket, boots, gloves, waterproof jeans, helmet et al…(zzzzzippp- fastening my jacket) zooming past the motorways. Going on a road trip on my bike…zzzzoooommm…..


I am a don’s moll, constantly showered with costly gifts by my gangster-drug dealer Don. In the dimly lit-with neon-lamps discotheques which my Don owns I shall give my special sexy performance (where I will be wearing a gold sequined slinky dress and high heels). And in a room in the top floor, Don shall be threatening a middleman for messing with the cocaine consignment and eventually shooting him point blank. Of course I am also having an affair with the doorkeeper of the disc.(wonder y but even in reality I find the disc doorkeepers with their long overcoats, blue tooth devices/bugs(I think that’s wat they are called) in their ear and stern face so hot!)


I am a Baywatch lifeguard. In this particular dream I am blonde (Pamelaji ki Jai!!). Wearing the red swimsuit, standing on my watchtower keeping an eye on the beach with my yellow binoculars. And when I hear the frantic call ‘help! help!’ I make the dramatic 'slow-motion' run towards the water and rescue him. Of course later myself and hunk (who I jus rescued) go on a date and then kiss with the sunset in the background.

In real life…
A law student trying to finish her reading before class, understand wat is being told in class, (as incomplete readings lead to incomplete comprehension), hope to clear her exams and get a job with her new found postgraduate status. Adventure quotient- nil, Social life- practically nil, Party scene- nil, Love life- what is that?

I cannot handle a normal TVS Scooty, forget handling a superbike. Infact I can’t even ride a bike. Drugs, deals, dons petrify me. I haven’t been to a disc/bar unless accompanied by brother-in-law or sister (and I also have the dubious distinction of being the only one landing up in track pants on a Friday nite) Imagine the sight of me introducing my doorkeeper boyfriend to my folks (i.e. if the Don spares us both). Red swimsuits and tanned bodies- my attempts at learning how to swim ended with me being highly hydrophobic, so much so that even a powerful bathroom shower can scare me off. And I will be charged for the offence of obscenity and indecent representation of women if I try to fit into a swimsuit and run. (huff pant pant…)

The closest I got to an exciting life was wen I was caught by the receptionist returning back to my hall on this early Saturday morning (the first time ever). Trying to sneak in without waking him up, I tip toe into the hall when
Receptionist: Hello young lady
Me: (deer caught by a headlight look) ooh! Hi good morning..
R: Well it sure is a good morning for u, isn’t it? (giving a cheeky smile looking like 'i caught u coming back from ur boyfriend's place')
Me: (trying to act brave, simultaneously walking to the door)..hahaha..well then have a nice day..
R: u sure did have a nice day afterall right… (nodding cheeky smile again)
Me: (by then ran up to my room)
[I let him live in the misconception that he is in, little does he know that I was at my friend’s place last nite and cudnt get a bus back from her shady area!!! At least somebody thinks I have a happening life!]


eljo said...

hmmm...whats all this overnite stay???? don ko phone lagaye kya??? even better dad ko phone lagaye kya??? u'll be grounded for life biker babe....muahahahah..

Rainman said...

Biker babe Ann.....riding a Harley Davidson.....this I would like to see.....lmao ;-)

Macadamia The Nut said...

LOL! My dear cybertwin, you have floored me again. Love that sense of humour. :D now i know why i prefered to dream in class rather than listen :|

Zennmaster said...

hey I tot you would get a change of your wild fantasies once you get out of school... but they still remain the same don they... ;)

Guess you are just a projection of the global phenonmenon of people wanting to get a life but life eluding them...

ps: have no idea what that meant btw... shud stop gettin sozzled and then comin online...

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

Walter Mitty meets Perry Mason?

Funny post. Btw, next time, wink at the receptionist. It will only enhance your reputation :D


mathew said... much trouble for making life spectacular..btw cut down the movies you watch..or maybe watch some adoor gopalkrishnan will loose all love for movie characters..;-P

and yeah i like the Don would be terrific..getting to shot people and all..give me a gun Al will i evr get to be the Al Pacino in 'scarface'..except that i dont get killed in the end..;-P

d_grail said...

xams and naukri ki is bhaag main creativity has gone out of the window..
will write a masterpiece soon :)

maneesh said...

ooh... life guard ann... i likes.. i like any girl in beachwear..after goa i like beaches even more though..

Utopian said...

Hey.. very interesting blog...dint go thru all the posts...whichever i went thru..were abzolutely amazing!!

Mark IV said...

ok.. let me be placid and give a drive back to reality...
dream 1- i can pretty well imagine you on the super bike- jacket et al.. but road junkie? thats high energy babe... rejected!

dream 2- yeah right! your more of the Don material. Id give you allowance for this dream if the don gets murdered under mysterious conditions and you get to take over. or where you keeping the don mistress all along anyway?

dream 3- baywatch lifeguard? rejected!

but what with the no excitement thing? you survived a good year in my proximity... and for most mortals thats exciting enough

anN-series said...

nahhiiiiii...u were the one who told me to 'get' a life!


dreams are more interesting in a highly academic environment like classrooms..but in my case i actually fall asleep...

didnt i tell u the saga of the ponytail, specs and conspiracy still continues

i shall do the needful..thanx for the idea ;~P

i do watch 'parallel' cinema (not a.gopalakrishnan yet sadly), but they are about normal ppl like me in reality. I cnt see reality in my dreams..and yeah u be the don..i shall be the chick..i will work out i promise...

i am waiting girl....(impatiently tho)

me in swimwear...bhaisaab u will then want saree to be made compulsory in goa

thank u :~)

@mark iv
see thats the whole year in school wid ur whacky company, now nothing is exciting enof..