Friday, January 04, 2008

New Year Revelations

Lot of revelations happened last year, especially in the last quarter, when I left home for the first time to firang land. Here are a few of them.

- A ‘please’ or ‘sorry’ or ‘thank you’ will only get your work done in England. Never said so many sorry, thank u please ever in my life.

- Even an Englishkaran (Englishman) has problems in understanding my English, which I thought had a neutral accent.

- It is the policy of National Health Services to ask you if u r pregnant on routine check up. It is not that they suspect/ accuse you of being pregnant.

- Don’t get shell-shocked if prophylactic is provided in the ‘student induction pack’.

- I still manage to get ‘looks’ from old 50-65 yr old Englishmen. Wonder y they keep thinking that I am interested in them!!!

- Rajma bursts when heated in a microwave and dal needs to be soaked before it is cooked.

- You have to attend to the milk kept on the hob. The hob doesn’t switch off on its own.

- I look like a Bangladeshi and Dad looks European Chinese (according to my Polish hallmate). And I thought we looked INDIAN!!

- Gatwick Airport resembles Bhatinda railway station as the Europeans also convert their bags into pillows and lie on the couches in the waiting area, thereby not letting others sit.

- Our ‘Cuticura’ is an international brand. Saw it lying in a dutyfree shop.

- When they have no reservations on a train, the Europeans like Indians will sit outside the loos and in some cases even inside.

- Inter City Express (ICE) touches 300km/hr only from Cologne to Frankfurt. (We should have gone further!)

- KÖLN is Cologne (this was my biggest revelation)

- Read about a place the next time I head somewhere. I have to go to Cologne once again to appreciate the Cathedral.

- Eau de Cologne is different from the water flowing in River Rhine through Cologne.

- Fallen snow resembles ice found in a refrigerator without defrost.

- The dumb actresses of the Indian film industry deserve some amount of respect. Its not easy standing on snow with a backless blouse and chiffon saree.

- I should just stick to juice as just one glass ends up making me dance much to the embarrassment of my company. (Disclaimer: I am not a drunkard, I dont go beyond a drink except that one dreaded time)

- Chech and I still look ‘under 18’ [according to German standards] as we were the only ones asked to show our passport for entry. (Man did I feel good!)

- Mum is still not concerned about my advancing age, Dad is still concerned about y he is not receiving any ‘pocket money’ demands from me.

- Ammachi thinks I am a little girl, she still calls me Minukutty (aargh!)

- Never rant about any blog in particular to Chettan to an extent which irritates him. He ended up attacking an unsuspecting fellow blogger, followed by attacks from Chech and yours truly. (Disclaimer: We r a heady mix, but we aren’t as crazy as we appear)

- Chettan is the brother I always wanted (Thank u Chech for the kidilum choice, Chetta- my Euro trip ;~D)

- Chech has become a very good cook, and I have gotten over the paranoia that she is trying to poison me.

- College is the best time of your life and u realise this only when u finish college and land up in an office staring at the computer and trying to sound pleasant and more importantly ‘knowledgeable’ to your clients.

- Office is the best time of your life and you realise this when u land up in college after a 4 month stint in an office and start hating homework and taking down notes in class. Suddenly ‘end of the month’ lost its significance and excitement.

- May be middle of this year when I am out of grad school I will appreciate it more.

- A stricter boss is a better boss. (BFD u r still my best mentor till date)

- There is no place like mum’s kitchen. Never looked forward to idiappam and puttu as I do now (Mum are u listening??)

- There is no better place to study than a room where u can overhear Mum humming. Over the past three months I ‘hear’ silence more often than sound. And there is no better luxury in knowing that ‘Dad will take care of everything’.

- I can never find a replacement for my best friend Vidhi. May our friendship continue forever and ever. Amen

20 comments:

Macadamia The Nut said...

That was one comprehensive list. Lol! I laughed my way through from beginning to end. How was your new year's eve? :)

Bullshee said...

interesting...recently met someone named minukutty...cute name...

i see that time in firanggland is givin ya a major case of the nostalgia vapors!

mathew said...

nice one..although long it was very interesting read..KÖLN was a surprise for me too..but the biggest surprise was comin to know that erstwile West berlin was within East Germany and nowhere near mainland west germany of old times..

and yeah being phoren is a good learning experience..and thats when we appreciate about good things back home..parents..and even little things like idiappam is so valuable now..

hey and chech becomin good cook..hmm...probably big bro is a kickass cook as well!!

P.S.and btw good that chettan knows abt another blogger ..now i know whose door to knock when am in amsterdam!!;-P

Mishmash ! said...

Funny yet a great list...and "Fallen snow resembles ice found in a refrigerator without defrost.: thats exactly what I told my mother too :)) and another revelation of mine was that how much i love my country now and how much i want to come back and settle down there, all thanks to this US trip !! :)

Shn

Crime Master said...

That was an interesting piece of enlightenment!!

//- Mum is still not concerned about my advancing age, Dad is still concerned about y he is not receiving any ‘pocket money’ demands from me.

Sigh, is that the case everywhere?!?! :D

Alameen said...

minukkutty,

kalakki...

Zee said...

amazing.....liked the actresses and snow in saree bit a lot! hahahaha!

Mark IV said...

It is the policy of National Health Services to ask you if u r pregnant on routine check up. It is not that they suspect/ accuse you of being pregnant.
are you?

I still manage to get ‘looks’ from old 50-65 yr old Englishmen. Wonder y they keep thinking that I am interested in them!!!
i keep telling u- take whats available or ud get stuck to the retirement home!

The dumb actresses of the Indian film industry deserve some amount of respect. Its not easy standing on snow with a backless blouse and chiffon saree.
ok... im not even attempting to try to imagine that you tried dressing all girly-girly!

and many many more... a good year to u too! :D

eljo said...

hmmm,sis trying to poison you... I have to rethink whether you should be coming here for Easter ;-p

maneesh said...

funnily minukutty reminded me of mohanlal's aye auto... minukutyy sudhiii.. aeiou.. etc etc..

Ankit said...

Seriously that is a long list and very nicely written.
I felt offended when somebody asked me for an age proof. But then you must have enjoyed that for sure :)

Rainman said...

So, what did you do on New Year's eve, other than getting all nostalgic?? ;-)

Aiswarya said...

Damn, dont it feel good, when they ask you for ID. My man, said.. ryt, i see ur driving liscence, now where is your passport. I laughed, he didnt! He wasnt joking. Damn, i felt good.

Well done. So nicely written!

germinal dreamer said...

strangely coincidental, i had been to doctor, i was asked if i were pregnant. I just dint answer.
nice!

anN-series said...

@mac
new years eve was on the street and running away from ppl who were smoking up..hope u had a good new yr..

@bullshee
there are lots of minukuttys on the prowl. ooh yeah firang land is making me nostalgic :~(

@mathew
till now i thot english was a funny language, now even german and germany are phunny. chettan is a good cook, but a better bartender :~P and make good use of the amsterdam invitation :~D

@mishmash
i think its hindi films tht gave us misconceptions of the snow. and yea i realised my love for India too..

@crime master
hehe...i am 'different'

@alameen
thanx

@zee
i have started respecting amisha patel too

@vikram
1)no i am not, peace be on earth
2)i think i will take ur advice
3) i didnt attempt it, it very cold with 3 layers of sweater imangine standing with jus chiffon!!

anN-series said...

@eljo
pliss pliss...yenna manichidu maa

@maneesh
oh ya that movie..and the song where mohanlal learns english :~D

@ankit
oh yes..wen hefty germans ask me, i am happy

@ brat
i was out on the streets, ppl smoking up around me and me running away from them

@aishwarya
thank u..ooh yea i use santoor, so i shud have expected such questions..

@germinal dreamer
i didnt answer first (i was too shocked to answer), then they asked me again..i shook my head

Tarun Jain said...

well while i agree with half of what you have jotted, would concede that didnt know about the other half dispute being here for some time now.

and ur blog does generate some traffic. the number of comments on each post tells a lot. keep blogging :)

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Anonymous said...

hey ann........um actually delighted to read this one...after all it has my name in it...and above evything...the same goes for me too.....no one can replace ur fraanssip in my life(getting inspired form ur post on orkut)!!
n yaaa...I must say...u r gifted with a gr8 observation power....u can find something funny in almost evy situation!!!